Weddings and cash gifts (ご祝儀) in Japan for foreigners

As a foreigner at a wedding in Japan you give cash, and the norm for a friend or colleague is ¥30,000. As of October 2026, a 2024 survey of couples in the Tokyo area found guests gave an average of ¥30,000 as friends or colleagues, ¥44,000 as bosses and ¥77,000 as relatives. The gift (ご祝儀, goshugi) goes in a special envelope, in new bills, in an amount that avoids certain numbers.

Getting legally married in Japan is a separate process. See international marriage in Japan. This page is about being a guest, or about what your Japanese guests will expect to give.

How much to give

Amounts below are averages that couples in the Tokyo area reported receiving in the Zexy 2024 survey. They are guides, not rules.

MUFG Bank’s guide adds that if you are senior to the couple, ¥30,000 or more is usual.

Does inflation change the ¥30,000?

A financial-planning site (September 2025) says ¥30,000 from a friend is still the norm. It cites Zexy 2024 figures of about ¥27,000 per guest in food, drinks and favors (引出物), so the gift may only cover costs. If you want to give more, it suggests ¥50,000, or adding a small present, a message card or a dinner with the couple, and avoiding ¥40,000.

Numbers and bills

• Avoid even numbers. They suggest a split. Avoid 4 and 9 too (4 sounds like the word for death).
• Eight is an accepted exception to the even-number rule.
• Use new bills (新札). Get them at a bank branch with a new-note ATM, or exchange old notes at a counter. Banks may charge a fee, so get them ahead of time.
• Couples and families. If you are invited as a couple, give one gift together: ¥50,000 or ¥70,000, not ¥60,000.

The envelope

1. Buy a ご祝儀袋 at a stationery store. Choose one with a cord (水引) tied in a 結びきり or あわじ結び knot, in red-white or gold-silver. A 蝶結び bow knot can be retied, so it is wrong for a wedding.
2. Put the bills in the inner envelope with the portrait on the front side, at the top. You do not need to glue it.
3. Write on the inner envelope the amount in old-style kanji (¥30,000 is 金参萬円) and your address and name.
4. Write your full name on the front, below the cord and a bit smaller than the 寿 mark. A brush pen is standard. If you can’t, a felt pen is acceptable.
5. Carry it in a ふくさ (a cloth wrapper) in a warm color such as red or orange, or in purple. Do not use blue or gray for a wedding.

Writing the amount and your name in Japanese can be hard if you read little Japanese. Ask a Japanese friend or colleague to check the envelope before the day.

Fee-based weddings (会費制)

Some weddings charge a set fee instead of a gift. MUFG cites a Mynavi Wedding survey that found the most common fee under ¥10,000, followed by ¥10,000 to ¥15,000. You do not normally give gift money there, though a present is acceptable. In the Zexy 2024 Tokyo-area survey, about 92% of receptions were gift-based, so a fee-based wedding is the exception.

If you can’t attend

• Already know you can’t come. About ¥10,000 is usual, a letter is optional. Send it so it arrives at least a week before the wedding.
• Cancelled after saying yes. Give the planned amount. The couple may still owe the venue, so send it by registered cash mail (現金書留) as soon as you can.

What else attending costs

Gifts are not the only cost. MUFG lists the afterparty fee, transport and hotel if far away, clothes, bags and shoes, and hair and makeup. Together, one wedding can cost about ¥100,000, so budget ahead if you have several invitations in a season.

Quick checklist for foreign guests

• Decide the amount from your relationship above.
• Get new bills ahead of time.
• Buy a ご祝儀袋 with a 結びきり knot.
• Ask a Japanese friend to check the writing.
• Put the envelope in a ふくさ.

If your family back home gives gifts differently, follow the Japanese custom for this event. If you need advice on the legal side of a marriage, ask your city office or a 行政書士.

Related: why Japan still uses cash and cashless payments.